The Crooked man. The Curtain Closes.

Have you ever started something that haven’t finished?

That back fence?

A relationship?

A bucket of chicken from our good friend the Colonel after a night out on the drink?

Well let me tell you a story.

Once upon a time a grown man with a brain that was 50% (Maybe more) CHILD came up with an idea. He remembered an old nursery rhyme from when he was little about The Crooked Man. It used to scare the absolute crap out of him, as his imagination was pretty wild. He would imagine the Crooked man, what he looked like and believe me it wasn’t cute.

The man decided to do a narrative all based on The Crooked Man. (If you go to my search thing you can read the seven acts).

Then the project just stopped for no real reason. It just lost steam I guess.

However what came from it was a warband of lead characterful minis.

Also, I’d made a diorama of the Crooked man which no one has seen but has been made for 7-8 months. I’m really very proud of this piece for several reasons.

  1. The Crooked Man looks, almost, exactly like what I imagined as a kid.
  2. I used Green stuff for his torso, his jaw and his hat. His hat looks a little rigid but I’m still quite pleased with it. Next time I’d make the brim tattered and the top bent.
  3. The Diorama base is one of my best terrain pieces in my humble opinion. I took my time with it and just kept adding bits here and there.
  4. The path he is walking on is crooked as you’ll see from the birds eye view shots.
  5. The Crooked Mans staff is over-sized which I think makes him look even creepier. I don’t know why, it just does haha.
  6. The Crooked man looks crooked, bent over.
  7. The whole vibe of the piece is dark and ominous.


Here is the poem:

There was a crooked man, and he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence against a crooked stile;
He bought a crooked cat which caught a crooked mouse,
And they all lived together in a little crooked house.
So cute –
Here is my second verse for the poem:
In the Crooked House
The man made crooked tools
To use upon the weak
unsuspecting fools
He would smile his crooked smile
and laugh at their crooked screams
They feared his crooked ways
and he filled their crooked dreams
Not so cute –

I hope you like it guys.












Now for the base. I’ve used one of my 300×300 terrain tiles for the sake of the photos but the actual diorama in the triangle shaped piece.



I’ve used 40k and fantasy bits to create a timeless feel to the whole thing.






As much as I enjoyed making The Crooked Man the whole project just lost traction for me.

However, the diorama looks mighty fine in my glass display cabinet so I’m happy.




42 thoughts on “The Crooked man. The Curtain Closes.”

  1. Proper grim. I approve. I approve of the rhyme also: that one’s a classic, though I could never remember how it ended.

    To answer your question: most things I’m not being paid to do run out of steam eventually. Unless obliged to do things in order to keep a roof over my head I do what I feel like doing.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Wow, I absolutely love this post. The backstory behind it, your addition to the original poem, and of course the Crooked Man himself (and his setting). It’s all fantastic. Also, how awesome that it turned out so much like what you had in your head when you envisioned him! Sometimes it’s so hard to match up what we might have imagined in our head when we actually are trying to create it, so kudos to you for nailing it! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well, that’s the content of my crooked nightmares sorted for the next month! Not sure which is darker, the whole diorama or the second verse of the rhyme! Was definitely worth finishing off! Very atmospheric!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yeah, that’s quite terrifying… I’ll not be sleeping tonight anyway!

    You’ve done a great job on the Crooked Man of course but you’ve really nailed the terrain, there’s a timeless, dreamlike quality to it but also an element of the apocalyptic that really sets the tone for the whole piece.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Love this, I originally thought the base looked a bit plain and could have done with more figures added, “a frightened child huddled behind some cover?” but the more I look at it the more I think it’s better the way it is. The miniature is just about perfect. Stunning piece, you could almost do with the poem inscribed around the edge of the base.

    Cheers Roger.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I like the idea of the inscribed poem! I might just do that Roger. The lonesome figure is symbolic in my opinion. He traverses the land for miles and miles scaring the crap out of everyone hehe.


  6. I used to think it was such an innocent children’s rhyme but now I don’t think I’ll be able to read this to my daughter. It will forever be associated with this boogeyman! Excellent job and probably mission accomplished 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I don’t think he’ll have a career doing children’s parties.

    I really like the diorama: the extra props in the landscape hint at a story we aren’t being told.

    Liked by 1 person

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